helga told us how during her time this elder, she felt like she had to ask her everything she could while she was with her. so she asked her how one could find happiness? how does one be happy? this spiritual guide very slowly and patiently broke it down for helga in two words:
first, you must accept. our problems start when we wish the present moment were different. every situation you find yourself in is a gift because it is the present. not just present as in this moment of time, but present as in with a bow on top. it doesn't mean you have to agree, just accept. when you don't accept, your mind goes into stories. there are no accidents, everything is perfect and how it should be. not accepting reality creates your turmoil. so...accept.
second, adjust. most the time this means adjust your thinking. change our thoughts, change your life. the key to self transformation. when you wish things were different that brings you suffering. never analyze why, just look forward, take 2 conscious breaths, and move forward with what you have.
so now i find myself in the middle of recent disappointment and i am trying to put this into practice. acceptance is the hard part. not wanting to fight it, but like so many times in my life when i've wanted something too much, i've learned that in the end it wasn't in my best interest. and although i couldn't see it at the time, there was always something better for me on the other side.